Monday, 20 May 2002 | Competing noises

Kronos Quartet, Philip Glass, and Dracula in the ring fighting Lawrence Welk and the Tonight Show band. While Kronos is on the offensive, I can't hear Welk & team wailing, though I can make out the deep sounds of their footwork on the hollow floor. But sometimes Kronos has to take a breather, you know, sit in their corner and get the wet sponge squeezed over their heads and wash the blood off their gloves, and that's when Welk takes over, demanding the attention of everyone in the arena, squealing in its upbeat tempo, paced and senior-friendly, and unbearably loud. The announcer tries to get Welk to take a seat, to quiet down, but he is obstinate. I was sadly mistaken when I thought my downstairs neighbors had moved out. Apparently that is not the case, and they are armed with new, unexpected ammunition.

***

"You look like a damn zebra."